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Geek to Geezer




“What’s with all you old geezers, walking hand 'n hand, with these young Chinese chicks?”


 


 
High School Social Geek: 
wasn't always an old geezer, I began my journey to ‘Geezerdom’ as a high school Social Geek. Self-diagnosed with a bad case of psycho-dwarfism, I was emotionally insecure. I had my first date in the 5th grade and my second in my third year of college. Swim class did me in. Back in the 50’s the boys went naked to swim class. Every Tuesday and Thursday, 29 teenage monster boys, with pubic hair and one little me, who wouldn't need to shave until the 21st century, bared all. The thought of asking a girl for a date to the prom, or even talking to any female other than the teacher, was terrifying.


Joe College 'Greek Geek':
 
 It wasn't until my third year in college, after I had armored myself with Chic Geek clothes, cars, bars, and fraternity brothers, that I dared ask a ‘her,’ or a ‘she’ out. "If, you can’t go Greek, go Teke.”
 
At twenty-one, I had my first cigarette, first beer, first aspirin and my other first I can't talk about in Toastmasters. After, seven years in university, three years as a GDI (God Damn Independent) plus four more as a frat-boy, Uncle Sam asked me if I wanted to join him in Vietnam. A traditional Geek response would have been to join the National Guard like George 'W' Bush, or say, "Hell no, I won't go," like Mohammed Ali, or even flee to Canada. 
 

 G.I.Joe Chic Geek

I chose the only Chic Geek solution and went with the US Marine Corps. 1968 was not a good year to graduate, I got drafted twice but as an aesthetically conscious architect I opted for the Marine Corps chic uniform, over Army geek. Although, Vietnam was the first ten year war, they knew I was a geek and instead sent me to the Philippines, Taiwan, Japan, Hong Kong, California, Panama, and Rio de Janeiro.

 

1st Marriage: Travelling Chic Geek: As an Architect/Interior Designer couple, we envisioned seeing the world on somebody else’s money. It worked out pretty well - Sao Paulo, Cairo, Cleveland, Chicago, Atlanta, Houston, Scottsdale, the Amazon, Nile River, Machu Picchu, Buenos Aires, Montevideo, Belgium, Holland and Singapore - until my employer asked me to use somebody else’s dime or dime equivalent. 

 "If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life

Never make a pretty woman your wife”

 

I blamed her for our demise and after, twenty-one